How to Host a Shower before a Destination Wedding and at Home Reception

Dear Gwyn,

My daughter is having a destination wedding in October, I would like to have a shower for her but not sure who to invite and how to word the invitation when her AHR won’t be until the following June …. What is proper? Please help!!!

More and more the non-traditional wedding is becoming tradition and so we must do our best to morph tradition into a wonderful celebration. Anyone as thoughtful as you to consider your guests deserves a gold star!

Because your daughter is having an ‘at home reception” after the ceremony it is more than acceptable to invite everyone to the shower who is invited to the reception. There are a few simple ways to help guests navigate the wedding celebrations:

  • Toasts: In a toast you can always remind guests that while your daughter is having a small private destination wedding, you are looking forward to celebrating with everyone at the reception in June.
  • Invitation Note: You are perfectly fine to have a traditional shower invitation that fits the theme of the shower.  If you do wish to call out the June reception which is separate from the ceremony, merely note “June reception to follow” much like a wedding ceremony invitation notes the reception or a save the date notes the pending nuptials.

For more information on balancing guests between showers and the ceremony here are a few more resources:

How do I indicate guests of bridal showers are not invited to the wedding?

Can I invite guests to a wedding shower who aren’t wedding guests?